Sunday, December 21, 2008

BABIES ARE HERE!!!!!!!!! Truly was induced Thursday morning and gave birth to two of the cutest little girls in the whole world!!! Baby A was 5 lbs 19 inches long, and Baby B was 4.5 lbs 17 inches long. Neither one had to go to the nicu. What a blessing and absolute miracle this whole journay has been. Truly and Shane are adjusting well and are completely exhausted. They are home now and doing well. Pictures to follow I promise!!!!

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Isn't he the cutest Rudolph you've ever seen?
This was taken after Paige's kindergarden christmas concert about the little gingerbread boy! She did such a great job on her part!
Ha Ha Ha Easton came up to me and said "I want to watch this movie!" and then put his hands on his cheeks. (Home Alone)

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Christmas is the absolute best time of the year. Here we are decorating the tree. I'm so thankful for my kids. Taylor, Paige, Easton and Brinley each bring a unique quality to our family. I wouldn't trade them for the world.

We were getting ready to hike up Usery Pass. My back was killing me when I was done! This was the first time that I took Easton and and Brinley. We made it up 3/4th of the way. They were toopers!


I have no pictures! Shaylar had the kids this holiday up in Show Low which left me solo. Ha ha it rhymes. Of course I had Brinley. It really was weird letting them go; I know Shaylar is the father and all but its still wierd. ya know? Anyway Keith and Charayye drove to Utah to be with her fam for the holiday which left mom, dad and me by oursleves. My Uncle Eric and his sweet girlfriend Kelly came to the rescue and we had a delicious dinner over there. Some of the Crocker Clan was there and it was great to see everyone. But get this.... when I drove to Payson to pick them up Easton had a full on mohawk! It was cute but also stupid. Plus Shaylar decided to get this huge tattoo that covers most of his upper back and of course the kids saw it. so disappointing !! I don't know I'm just venting I guess. Its really hard to try and teach your kids how to make good choices when there are other influences in their lives. I'm not worried they are good kids. I don't care if he reads this its my blog now. oooooooh I sound so bitter but I'm not :) really. Any thoughts or advice?

Saturday, November 29, 2008

You know life is basically good right now. I still have my downer days but the tears have basically stopped flowing. I've met really nice people who understand what I'm going through and that helps. I know I'm so new at this and have a millions steps to go through before I'm ready to get married again, but I do want that in the future. No one wants to be alone and if they do they are lying. The problem is that no matter how good I'm feeling about myself I always have in the back of my mind.....I have four kids. Four amazing beautiful children and who really is going to be interested in a woman with four kids? What a sacrific that is to not only get married but take on four kids? Who knows. I'm worth it right? I have so much love to give and whoever it is that falls in love with me will fall in love with my kids too and they will be the lucky one!!!......'Someday my prince will come' ....:)
My dad working on his beloved Harley Davidson. What a stud
Her name is Boo! My mom rescued her from outside her work building the day before halloween...hense the name :)
Batman! danananananadananan Batman!
Stunning, what a fin!
I vwant to suck yur bloooooodddd!
I had a scary vampire, a beautiful mermaid, a stealthy batman, and an adorable cow....maybe I should of been the cow ha ha ha!
Carving pumkins with Uncle Keith and Papa Crocker. And yes we saved the seeds and made homeade pumpkin seeds. (they are good but I don't really get all the hype about them :))
She got some really fun stuff!
My only sister-I love her.
I went up to Utah for my sister Truly's baby shower. It was so fun to see her like always. As of today she is 34 weeks and 2 days-what a blessing. For the entire scoop check out her blog. You can access it from mine. I'm so excited for her and Shane. I can't wait to hold, smell, squeeze, and just look at those two beautiful girls.

Flat Stanley visited Truly this past fall and I had to get a picture with him.

Bath time! She is a butterball! I love her sooooo much. She is my special little friend.
My mom bought a new bed so when it came I wouldn't let my dad throw the box away cause it would make an amazing club house! Come on we all have momories of playing in huge boxes of cardboard and I wanted the same for my kids. My dad aka 'The Legend' went to work and tada! the coolest funnest club house ever! The kids LOVED it.
I was kind of bored one day so I took the kids to Hobby Lobby and we decided to make christmas ornamanets! I bought wooded snowflakesa and the kids painted them and decopaged (sp?) scrapbook paper to them. not too messy at all :)

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Its hot here!

I'm sitting here with my lap top in bed reading every ones thoughtful comments and concerns AGAIN. Thank you. We have felt of your prayers. I'm certain they helped me get through this horrible mess. I'm really doing good and so are my kids. We have successfully moved in to my wonderful parents home, enrolled in their new school (Zaharis Elementary which I LOVE!!!!), Easton is going to Mrs. Carrie's Preschool(so fun), and Brinley is fat and happy. Life is moving along and I'm so grateful for my parents. To be honest I don't want to move into my own house right now. I love having the company and support and my kids need to see what a marriage should be like. We have a great schedule where I cook and my mom cleans up! Hello cleaning up is the worst part about cooking for me so now I get to cook and relax! My girls take turns setting the table and clearing the table which has been a great routine that they take pride in. I sing to them every night hoping to create a soothing bedtime routine for them. Real moms know that doesn't always work:) My brother and his sweet wife, Charayye, are living here temporarily too. This situation might drive some people crazy but its not bad at all and works for us.
I have good days and bad days but the bad days are growing farther apart. It hurts looking back through by blog and seeing all the family pictures knowing the truth behind them. I was desperately trying portray something that was completely different than what was really going on the last few months. Honestly in the beginning I was hoping Shaylar's new thoughts on life would blow over like other issues in the past and I could just keep it quiet. How many woman out there are suffering inside but faking it through comments and pictures and lying through their teeth? You know part of the reason I quit blogging is because I was so sick of reading about everyones wonderful perfect children, husbands, and lives. I'm not a cynical person and i don't envy. I faked it so how many other people are too. I think we all need to be more real regarding what we blog. Somedays I'm a horrible screaming mommy and I hate that I have to stay home with my kids. Somedays I stay in my pjs and don't get in the shower till 3 pm. Sometimes I don't want to be a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend. I just want to be me and leave. However, sometimes I wake up so thankful I'm choking with emotion. I talk and read to my kids. Make yummy dinners and look fantastic. Clean my house and play the piano. I'm not crazy or bipolar and I've come to realize that I'm real. I do the best I can and trust in my Savior.
I really am happy. I've had a few people tell me that 'I'm back'. I didn't realize I was gone till my marriage ended and I could step away and look at it from a different perspective. This is a blessing in disguise for me. I needed to get my four beautiful children here and now I can get a life. A happy life. Tonight I was looking at a lovely family picture taken on a family hike one year ago. It had me, Shaylar, Taylor, Paige, and Easton sitting on a log looking so happy. I was about 11weeks pregnant with Brinley. Crazy how things change so drastically. I can't have what never was. Thats why pictures can be desceiving at times.
Everyone has been given free agency but it didn't come free. It came at a price and depending how we use it it will cost us dearly. How are we using our 'free' agency? Keep what matters most very close to you. I've come to realize my husbands decisions do not reflect me or my choices. Its not my fault and I am a good person. My life can only go uphill from here. Gosh only a few things could be worse but I'm not going there. Life is going to be good i can feel it. I'm going to blog again but I'm not going to post everything since my life became a Jerry Springer episode. Hopefully my life will be a Cinderella story!!
This is hard. It will continue to be hard. I was in the Temple awhile back and I had a wonderful feeling come over me. My life can only get better if I put my trust in the Lord. Sounds simple I know but at different points in each of our lives simple truths become astounding revelations. Go forward with faith and trust in his divine guidance and i can't go wrong. I took that leap of faith and left all the comforts of amazing friends (I miss you guys so much! girls night out rocks!) supportive ward and bishopric, great job, the best weather in the world, my big beautiful house, and biking to come here and heal. Its worked and I'm happier for it.
Time will march on, hearts will heal, and memories will fade. So I'm living in the now, learning to love myself, and am going to create fantastic memories for my kids and am determined to give them a healthy happy childhood full of play time and love.

Friday, September 5, 2008

I have so much to post; I'm so far behind. However I've been going through my own personal hell for the past few months. I can't believe this is happening to me. I never thought I would be a statistic of divorce. The kids and I are moving to the valley next week. Keep us in your prayers especially my children. I know with the Lord's help and the support of my friends and family I will get through this. I'm not ignoring anybody and know that I love all of you. I just can't blog or read other people's blogs right now. Its too hard and it hurts too much.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Brinley's Blessing

My two beautiful girls in white!! Shaylar once again gave a beautiful babies blessing. Like I said we had a big important weekend!! During the blessing my Dad who was in the circle said that he couldn't help but peek and Brinley was smiling ear to ear!! I love that girl. Shaylar also said that when he said amen and opened his eyes she was staring right at him and smiling! Can it get any better than that?

Everyone who attended. I sure wish that the rest of the family could of been with us to celebrate this wonderful weekend. Miss you guys!

Taylor's Baptism

Taylor at four years old
'This is my day,
My Baptism day,
Jesus wasy Baptized
The very same way.'
I just can't believe my sweet Taylor is old enough to be baptized! It was a wonderful morning that I will remember forever. Everyone that participated did a great job. I only hope I can do my part now and continue to teach her about the atonement, repentance, and The Holy Ghost. I'm so proud of her.
Taylor wrote her own baptism program. I loved this because its so personal. Those of you who really know her know that writing her own program was the greatest thing to her!! Taylor is the greatest kid!!

Daddy and Taylor. This picture means so much to me.All the family that was here to attend her baptism. Thanks for coming everyone!!!

She has the sweetest spirit about her. She told me that morning that she was so excited to get baptized.Well I almost had Brinley smiling can't you tell? ha ha

Happy Forth of July!!!

I didn't get any pictures cause I forgot my camera but we did go to the Show Low parade. We would of had to park pretty far and walk but we took the truck so yep we took it off road and parked right behind a business on the parade street! It was awesome. We sat with the Jones family and they had two bins full of water balloons which we threw at the people in the parade. It was hillarious -for all you softies who think that is mean, the people in the parade were begging us to throw them at them cause it was so hot! The boys accidently threw a few too hard and it splashed the family sitting directly accross from us and the old man got so mad he came over, cussed at us, called the motorcycle cop over (who looked at him like he was an idiot) and demanded we get dump out the rest of the water balloons. Can you believe that!!! Stupid man. Anyway we just dumped the water out of the tubs and continued to toss balloons gently.
My parents and great grandma Payne came up for the big weekend. We started it off with a BBQ at Grandma and Papa Hatch's house. They live in a flatter area and its easier for my kids to ride their bikes. We brought 'bumble bee' (transformers) and took turns riding it around. Fun time! (20 miles per hour!

Watching fireworks!!! oooooooh, aaaahhhhhhhh

Monday, July 7, 2008

I turned the corner and Easton had pulled everything out of the game and linen closet! What you can't see is that most of the games and open and scattered everywhere under the blankets and towels!! He said he wanted the game Buckaroo which of course was on the top. He was such a good boy to help me clean it up.
YES! Buckaroo rocks!!
I call her my budda sometimes cause I rub her tummy for good luck!
I bought the kids a blow up pool and put it on the back porch with their little red slide-hours of fun!! Yes it does get kind of hot up here.
The other day Paige asked why Dad had to work and I told her so he can make money so we have a house to live in and a car to drive, food to eat..etc. They looked at me for awhile and then Taylor said she wanted to make a surprise party for Dad to tell him how much we appreciate his working so hard. They all made a poster and wrapped homemade gifts for him. It really was one of the sweetest things they have done on their own.

Monday, June 23, 2008

Fun Game that fellow bloggers are doing...So why not join in the fun?'s harder than it looks! Erase my answers, enter yours, and post it. *Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following...*They have to be real places, names,things...nothing made up! Try to use different answers if the person in front of you had the same 1st initial. You CAN'T use your name for theboy/girl name question.

VEHICLE: Range Rover
CITY: Rocky Point
BOY Name: Randy
GIRL NAME: Rebecca
FOOD: Rice
REASON FOR BEING LATE: Ran out of time

Now....Your Turn!!!

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Dental check-up time!!! Comes in handy when your daddy is your dentist! Taylor was first and I already took her to Show Low Play Days and didn't get a picture! :( Paige thought the xray machine was pretty cool and that she could see her teeth on the computer screen.

Growing up too fast!!
OK when your son comes to the back door with fresh concrete all over his hands and you know that your neighbors just poured a brand new driveway one tends to freak out! Right? I ran next door and thank goodness Easton had the sense to just play in the left over concrete in the wheelbarrow. I about died! I tried so hard to keep my kids away and they listened really well so I was surprised when I saw Easton (well not really!)
Last week we had a BBQ at Grandma and Papa Hatch's new home in Pinetop. Yummy!

Her favorite sleeping position is cuddled up right next to me!
We were watching a movie together as a family and Easton had to go to the bathroom. He usually yells "Mom all done!" and when I didn't hear it for awhile I went to check on him and while he was washing his hands with soup he decided to do his hair and clean the mirror!! Oh man that kids makes a mess fast!
HAPPY 8th BIRTHDAY TAYLOR!!! We started the festivities off by eating at Red Robin. Taylor was so cute while they sang happy birthday to her. We were heading to Mukutos Island next and then the Diamondbacks game and were running short on time so after they got done singing everyone started to pack up and pay for their food. I looked over and poor Taylor is shoving icecream in her mouth as fast as she could go! Duh she had to eat her icecream so of course we all chilled out and waited-poor thing!

If you have never been to Mukutos Island then you are missing out! Its a huge indoor playground for kids and adults. Shaylar and I had as much fun as the kids! Yellow slide anyone?
Go Diamonbacks!!!! We had a lot of fun with Keith and Charayye. It was so good to see them. We only took Taylor to the game cause it was her birthday. I think that meant more to her than the actual game.

This was Charayye's nickname since she was little so of course we took a picture!!!

Taylor's ice cream cake

Somebody tasted some ice cream......

Taylor got her first pair of scriptures!!! She is getting so big too fast. I can't believe my baby is going to be baptised in two weeks. July 5th is the big day. Taylor has always been so independent and smart. She LOVES to create books and read. She is always leaving sweet notes around the house and is an amazing big sister. She is a good example to her three younger siblings and I'm so thankful she is the oldest because she is such a great help! I know Heavenly Father loves her very much and having her in our family is a blessing.
I just realized that I never got a picture of the fathers for Father's Day!! I'm so bummed. Happy Father's Day Shaylar, Daddy, and Barry!!!! These three men are each amazing in their own special ways. They are all so different and bring such fun and adventure to my life! Shaylar our kids LOVE you and always cry when you leave out of town. That says something! I love you too and I'm glad you are the father of my kids......aaaaaa who else would it be?! Barry-you work so hard! I love that you are so smart with finances and are willing to work with family. What would we do without you? No, seriously. Daddy-you are the most selfless person I know. It brings tears to my eyes to think of all the unknown and known things you have done for me. I know I can count on you for anything. All of you stay safe and healthy!!!
LOVE this picture! Truly and Mom check out the toes HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!